Winning is problematic

Posted: March 24, 2017 by isaiahjc410 in Uncategorized


The feelings of a winner in blue

(Drake inspired * More Life)

Patterson men’s varsity basketball team 2016-17 city, regional, and state champions. Now holds schools best record at 26-3 & helped head coach Harry Martin reach his 201 win. Doesn’t this sound like one of those remarkable accomplishments you hear in a movie or at some county school.

Well I lived this I was there for everyday of it 1st in and last out. I tried to cherish every last minute of it because I knew it was my last go around. Although after accomplishing all there was to accomplish still no signs of change. No signs of support, rare congratulations, no change at all in school spirit. I’m just here to tell you that in this society even if you win you get treated as a loser. I’ve been asked about 20 times in the past few weeks “How does it feel?” and quite honestly all I could say was bland.

Sorry to say but it’s just not what you expect especially here at this exact school. It had to be the most un-exhilarating experience I’ve ever had in life. The playoff games at Comcast were dull, no home team support no fun in the games or anything. It felt like I was a chess on a board and coach Harry had all the pieces versus a very smart century team that played with poise but not enough stamina. I knew in the closing two minutes of a game like that we were state champions but I was expecting some sort of emotion to hit some sort of happiness or sadness to climax. It never came, as we collected the accolades I tried holding the trophy and jumping up and down like I dreamed of over the previous summer, but it just didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like my last ride, it wasn’t special and for sure wasn’t what I expected after seeing other former champions. As I sat in the locker room squeezing the life out the trophy I came to a realization that all I wanted was another chance at this whole 4 year process and that as much of a hard worker I am; my fate has to be better than this.

An unsatisfied champion is what I felt, instead of the sigh of relief that a champion should feel. I didn’t feel, instead the lack of appreciation from my peers, the city, and everyone was just sickening to me.  I was expecting to feel like I was on top of the world for once in my life but instead I felt like I was on the bottom like I was left out from something great that is ahead. All could think about is why? Why is this not how it seemed.

My fate I feel has done me wrong. I felt like I didn’t belong there, like it was supposed to be of more significance. I think back to the beginning of the season, we were announced the number 13th team in the state in the preseason and I was the one who spoke out when our coaches said they feel as though we’re not that good to even be ranked 13th. They spoke of statistics of my previous season and everyone on the team which none were good but I still paid that no mind at all. I let that motivate me to want to be a better player and even better team on top of the motivation I had from my peers trash talk and just overall desire to be a winner. Players from schools like Lake Clifton who brought in transfer who’s supposedly a top 100 player in the class of 2017 said exactly “Oh Patterson? We going beat them by 30!” his teammate also said on twitter ”I hope you really not guarding me because if so you’re going to be  in for a long night”  along with a player from Edmondson saying “ I hope you get that starting spot this year” in the most sarcastic way possible. Everything that those players said was not backed up on the court. Neither of them beat us or became a state champion or city champion.

Although I would not even recommend them to be one if they felt how I felt after winning it. I sacrificed and put my pride to the side. As a senior I did what had to be done to become a champion, because I knew it was for the better of the team, and not for me and my role was to not be selfish and make the right play even if a player made the same bad play I made, what they did was right and what I did was wrong. This was supposed to be a selfish year but instead I chose to sacrifice to be a champion, and some of you may never know that feeling but I hope if you do that it isn’t as blue as mine.

A city, regional and state champ and that’s great but I know I and we deserve more, but drake said it feels even better when you know your 1st but still placed second (DRAKE \more life –did I lose you). I just don’t understand, how we’re the best team in the city and the city know it but Poly is on the front cover of the sun newspaper holding up the state championship 3A trophy and not PATTERSON who beat them in the city championship but I guess winning is problematic. As the season was going and people realized after we beat Lake Clifton and Perry Hall 4A champions (beat Poly by 30+) we were working towards establishing that we were good and that right there let me know I guess people love you more when you’re working towards something and not when you have it. It’s all over though now, it’s all behind us and all I have is the decisions of what’s next? As a winner you feel that new opportunities open up but as a senior struggling to choose out of colleges I had no intentions on going to when I first came to high school are all sought of top priority now NO OFFERS NO INTERESTS AND NO PROMISING FUTURE. Just me and my hardworking characteristics to carry me wherever my fate may be, and for that I ask that it’s far far away from here.

  1. Anonymous says:

    This is remarkable. You should keep writing more about your experiences.

    Liked by 1 person

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